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Kathleen: I am not even remotely knowledgeable regarding your issues but just wanted to let you know that I can sense the great pain you are and have bee in and hope/pray that God hears your cries and will guide you clearly and quickly in the right direction!! And don’t feel bad if there are no replies to this as the thread seems deader than a dinosaur.

Thoughts from a DID Systems Specialist

Music: Donna Russell and the UUFDC Choir, conducted by Cynthia StiehlService Leader: Chuck Lauter

They felt hatred from the very people they cared the most about.

Other than not buying into other’s dislike of me and not growing to hate myself, I really relate to what is being said here. Do I need to rule this out? Will it help me understand my life better? How to be in the world?

What happens if that child feels hated instead of loved?

What if it isnt just the bad pepol that hate you but evreybody? What if its the right thing for them to do becase you deserve to be hated, if you deserve it then they dont be doing anything wrong. Espeshally if you deserve it becase your bad.

WMC Speech Project is dedicated to raising public and media awareness about online harassment.

I think a lot of our self-hatred comes from survivor guilt.

I don’t know why people seem to hate you, but I do know as you deal with what has happened things will get better (they have for me and others) for now just be happy that your going somewhere better. Feel sorry for those that haven’t started the journey.

I read the first paragraph and had to go for a walk.

I feel a little better after having read the comments above. All my life I’ve tried to practice kindness to others and haven’t expected much in return nor dho I ardly ever ask for anything. yet I get the feeling that many hate me and I know I’ve done nothing or little to deserve it.

I’m going to talk to my dad to try and find out what happened.

I had a friend who became increasingly depressed being around him was difficult I couldn’t reach him, he was numb. He must have felt nobody cared for him but it’s not true.

Learn to separate who did what, and what belongs to whom.

Keep working on that self-hatred thing. It really can mess up your life, and in my opinion …. when people can learn to self-soothe their hurts and pain (instead of turning to self-injury or self-hatred), they can address the hurt, but come out ok because self-soothing helps the person to feel better instead of worse.

You can be different from that.

hi thunder2020 —
Welcome to the Discussing Dissociation blog.
I think genuine kindness speaks for itself. I don’t understand why people hate those who are kind – unfortunately, yes, that happens – but that just makes no sense to me.
Maybe it is ok to be kind to yourself? And if you are kind to yourself, it might not matter what other people think, especially if you have done nothing to deserve their hatred. Don’t take it in – stick to your kind ways. That is much better.

I wish you the best in your healing journey.

Yes, you probably can work through plenty of transference issues with your male therapist (even about mother issues). I’d be willing to bet you can go a long ways there, especially since it sounds like you have a good relationship with him. And later, there might be a time in the future, if need be, that you could be in a place to try working with a woman, just in case you would benefit in challenging that female relationship issue. But keep going where you are — you can get lots done with someone you enjoy working with.